I have been reluctant to write about this subject for a very long time now. Quite frankly, I feel I will only have earned my right to talk about it once I'm totally sorted on the topic. But earlier this week I received another email asking for advice on how to deal well with the … Continue reading Another dreaded pregnancy announcement…
There are good days and there are days when another wretched pregnancy announcement seems impossible to stomach and the tears of frustration and envy are never far away. There are days when the adoring photo of father with baby son plastered across social media feels like a cold, hard hand slapping across the face. There … Continue reading There are good days and…
As we approached the end of 2017, I found myself marvelling at the realisation that I was no longer zoning in on 23:59 on 31st December in an eagerness to shake the dust off my feet from a difficult year and launch over the threshold into a spotless new year, as yet untainted by pain … Continue reading Acceptance with Joy
As I sleepily shuffled to the toilet in the pitch black early hours of the morning a few days ago, I distinctly heard God's voice speak to my semi-conscious mind, "I have not forgotten you. I just need you to trust me". Trusting God has been a recurring refrain from our Father's heart to these … Continue reading Middle of the Night Shufflings
“Sing, O childless woman, you who have never given birth! Break into loud and joyful song, O Jerusalem, you who have never been in labor. For the desolate woman now has more children than the woman who lives with her husband,” says the Lord. 2 “Enlarge your house; build an addition. Spread out your home, and … Continue reading A song of joy; rebuilt with treasure – Isaiah 54
On Sunday at our church's Christmas carol service I had the privilege of sharing what God has been talking to me about over the past few months. These videos, made by my incredibly talented friends Georgia Hrubiak and Alastair Errett, talk a little about how God can bring us through circumstances from which we thought … Continue reading Hope is still my battle cry!
Christmas is joy and fun and laughter and grace (bring it on!) but it can also be sitting with situations that make us sad and determining to look to unrelenting hope in the face of darkness. Perhaps it’s depression or the loss of a loved one or dashed dreams or an unexpected diagnosis. Yet still … Continue reading Glory in the Darkest Place
Sometimes it helps to remember that loss/grief is not linear and has no time limit. And in this way it is also helpful to remember that healing works in the same way.
We came back here today - a kind of pilgrimage of peace - six months after our last visit. Last time I sat in these hands we were preparing for our IVF embryos to be transferred in. We were so full of hope and expectation having recovered from the devastation of the events of the … Continue reading Tho He slay me…..
The other day I found myself listening to the song that helped me through our first failed IVF pregnancy at the beginning of the year. It's a beautiful song by Emile Sande called Breathing Underwater and sums up for me the incredible, despair-free journey we took as we lost two little ones to miscarriage over … Continue reading We’re going on a Bear Hunt